Van der Pop

Edible Complex

ADVICEApril Pride
IMAGE COURTESY OF WAYNE THIEBAUD

IMAGE COURTESY OF WAYNE THIEBAUD

Dear Vandy,
Why do edibles seem more potent than smoking?
Signed, 
Edible Complex

Dear Edible Complex, 

Firstly, most painfully potent memories of consuming edibles occurred prior to the availability of well-packaged, specifically dosed 10mg treats. So if you haven't given it another try since college, I highly encourage you to try, try again. 

You may also equate potent and unpredictable. With a joint, you know when you can expect to feel its effects and more-or-less what those effects may be (get high on your own supply to be assured): directly to your nervous system, instantaneous (30 to 90 seconds) feeling. Whereas, edibles are creepers. Edibles. Are. Creepers. 

Edibles are also affected by your metabolism, which is unpredictable. Meaning if you took back-to-back spinning classes on a Saturday morning, you may feel the effects more quickly than if you slept in and met friends at a proper greasy spoon. What's on your stomach certainly impacts how quickly the edible is metabolized, too.  Similar to drinking on an empty stomach or directly after a run. Dissimilar in that the effect is not instantaneous. Did I mention that edibles are creepers? One’s patience is where JV and varsity are quickly distinguished. I vividly remember the day I lettered. My 35th birthday. The Day Wrecker, a frisbee-sized cookie, lived up to its moniker.

In addition to carefully considering and fully preparing before ingesting anything called The Day Wrecker, that never-ending day taught me no two edibles are the same (another unpredictable factor), always have another snack on hand other than the delicious cannabis-laced dessert and edibles are creepers. Edibles. Are. Creepers. Videos and the incredibly thorough, really fun to read The Good Ship Guide to Edible Cannabis advise waiting an hour before determining you need more. During that hour, if you call a friend ten times inquiring about their ETA, the edibles are working! Even if you feel no physical sensation, easily read a magazine or hold a completely normal conversation with your boss or kids. If you call someone 10 times in 60 minutes, your ability to judge and manage time is not in tact. This is a clear indication that “they are working.” I mention this because when the clock hits an hour, I’d think real long and hard about my behavior since I ingested the gummy, cookie, chocolate, popcorn, whatever contained cannabis and is now swimming in your stomach. Any signs of creeper-high behavior? 

So, Edible Complex, edibles seem more potent than smoking for many reasons including our own carelessness, stupidity and inexperience. If you don’t act like a Varsity Captain from the second you're in, the unwanted side effects of ingesting too much pot like dizziness, nausea, vomiting, hallucination, and paranoia will bring you down like a freshman (picture Parker Posey humiliating you for thinking you can hang with the cool kids).

While you're nodding your head yes to this hard-earned sense, purchase a few bottles of Cannasafety to protect yourself from unpredictable product and judgement. 

Highest regards,
Vandy

 

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